Advanced T-SQL Triage: I’m Running a Pre-Con at SQLDay in Wroclaw
On Monday, May 11th, I’ll be in Wrocław, Poland for SQLDay 2026, running my full-day workshop Advanced T-SQL Triage: The Art of Fixing Terrible Code.
Quick pronunciation note before we go any further: it’s *VROTS-wahf*. Not “Rock-law.” Not “Rack-claw.” Not whatever you just tried in your head. The “W” is a V, the “ł” is a W, and the “c” is making its own decisions.
I was wrong about it for years. You will be too. That’s fine. The Poles are patient people (I hope).
SQLDay is the largest data conference in Central and Eastern Europe, held at Centennial Hall — a UNESCO World Heritage building that genuinely makes the average US convention center look like a storage unit.
Workshops are Monday the 11th, the main conference runs Tuesday and Wednesday. If you’re anywhere in Europe and you’ve been meaning to catch one of these workshops in person, this is the one.
All attendees get free access to Learn T-SQL With Erik.
What the day looks like
A full day rescuing T-SQL from itself. We’ll look at queries that are actually broken and fix them:
– Paging logic that scans when it should seek
– Window functions that spool and spill because no one gave them a sort to work with
– Indexed views that look clever on paper and lock everything in practice
– Data modifications that block like linebackers
– Dynamic SQL that’s parameterized, fast, and safe
– When CROSS APPLY is the right tool, and when you’re reaching for it because you don’t want to think
– Views vs. inline TVFs vs. scalar UDFs, and why the optimizer treats them very differently
– Why RIGHT JOIN is not simply LEFT JOIN spelled backwards
– Rewriting scalar UDFs so they stop wrecking your execution plans
You’ll leave with a cheat sheet, a working mental model for diagnosing slow queries without guessing, and — if you haven’t been to Wrocław before — a strong case for staying an extra day.
Details
– Workshop: Monday, May 11, 2026 (all day)
– Conference: Tuesday–Wednesday, May 12–13, 2026
– Where: Centennial Hall, Wrocław, Poland (in person + online)
– Register: Here
If your queries scare you, come fix them with me. And if you’ve already got them under control, come anyway — there’s a three-day conference right after, and Wrocław’s old town is worth the flight on its own.
Going Further
If this is the kind of SQL Server stuff you love learning about, you’ll love my training. Blog readers get 25% off the Everything Bundle — over 100 hours of performance tuning content. Need hands-on help? I offer consulting engagements from targeted investigations to ongoing retainers. Want a quick sanity check before committing to a full engagement? Schedule a call — no commitment required.